Goodbye Ms December - A special year...

...Goodbye Calendar Girls, Happy New Year

For the last 12 months I've been a bone fide calendar girl, but come midnight I'll be a has been!

My colleagues and I have graced the walls of many homes bringing our brightness, body confidence messages and a monthly reminder to check ya tits! In doing so we raised over £12k for charity* - not bad, considering it all started as a flippant Facebook comment.

On a personal level, it was an incredible experience... so much so that rather that losing something because I'm no longer a calendar girl, I've gained lots - a sense of achievement, a fresh perspective on the power of image consulting, more, and most importantly fabulous new friends.

Thank you to everyone who supported us - from sponsoring printing, reading and sharing my #30daysofbodypraise blogs, and putting us on your walls.

The calendar may be gone but we'll always be calendar girls and why we did it is still an issue, so I ask that you continue to support Breast Cancer Now* and follow us on Twitter at @_BodyConfidence.

Wishing you all a fabulous 2016.
Denise x

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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Social media - The tool that's helping me step up my style

Developing my image via Insta!

It's been a while since my last blog - I've been busy at work of late and away a bit, but I have to confess I've also been a little distracted by a new social media platform in the last month.

I recently joined Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/denisese_db/), and it's been a surprise to me that rather than paying attention to the fashion, I've been focussing on make-up and manicures.

I suspect that because I'm comfortable with my style, I've been drawn to what I can develop to boost my image overall. So inspired have I been that my recent image purchases haven't been clothes, shoes or handbags as usual, but a full set of make-up brushes (...not that I know how to use them all!)

It's not that I've been unable to do makeup or manicures (https://www.pinterest.com/dendambelle/client-journeys-events/), it's just that I'm not trained in all things image (not to mention that some things are harder to apply some things to yourself!)

Social media, along with the internet and blogs, is great for helping you step up your style game - Pinterest and Instagram are especially good as they are so visual. What platforms, if any do you use, and...

If your image needs a refresh, what would you have to focus on?

Whether clothes, make-up, accessories or beauty, social media can provide some great ideas and inspire your style development, but remember as this Judy Garland quote suggests don't be a copy. Style is about authenticity...

Good luck developing your original!
Denise x

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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My top 10 tips on loving your clothes purchase(s) at home

How to buy clothes you'll still love when you look at them in your mirror at home.

Last week I did a corporate style event in LK Bennett's Covent Garden store, and found myself dispensing advice to lots of lovely ladies with one common theme - how they got from loving something on the mannequin to actually wearing it once they'd left the shop with it.

I heard then, and hear often, from women (and men) who have numerous unworn items in their wardrobe(s). If that's you, I dare you to calculate that cost! And then, read on for my top tips on avoiding adding more regrets to it.

My ten top tips (in no particular order!)

Try things on and do the 360!

1. Don't go shopping blindly

...know what you already own that will work with what you're about to buy - from accessories to underwear. 

2. Put on the right footwear to try stuff on with

...Why? Because, for example, heel height will change the length something appears and it will alter your posture affecting the overall impact. Trying to tip toe to the right height rarely works as we concentrate on not toppling over!

3. Be conscious of the impact of store lighting on the colour of your chosen item

...Try and get near natural light if possible or imagine yourself under dinner lighting. Don't be shy about leaving the changing room! Walking about will also help you know if something feels comfortable as well as if it looks right.

4. Know your shopping horror history

...If all your previous shopping horrors have been when you've shopped alone: go shopping with a trusted (honest yet diplomatic!) friend or better still a stylist especially if your purchase is expensive and/important. If all your mistakes have been after a few lunchtime drinks with Belle from the office - don't do that again!

“If all your mistakes have been after a few lunchtime drinks with Belle from the office - don't do that again!”

5. Step away from the mirror and do the 360

...It may look great on, face on and close up but does it look the same at a distance and from a different perspective?

6. Play with it!

...For example, as a petite I know that I might have to have something altered so I'll try and create that scenario in-store. If you think something needs adjusting ask the store if they can tape the change (eg hem, sleeve length) for you. Changing something can alter the overall look. LK Bennett, for example, will do alterations.

7. If you can, get someone to take a photo of you in the outfit

...Again, it's about seeing things from a different perspective.
Important: This is not an opportunity to criticise yourself but to critique an outfit.

8. Go knowing you

...Get to know your best colours, understand your body shape and think about your style personality - you may love the idea of something more than you'll love it on you

9. Have a place/event in mind that you know you'll wear the item or outfit to.

...We've all brought something fab and had it languish in our wardrobe for an age before having a suitable place to wear it to. That's ok with a classic piece but not a high fashion piece which may not be in fashion next year!

I know it sounds obvious, but...
10 ...actually Try stuff on! I've worked with people who hate shopping so they rush in and buy something, those who buy because they like the look of something in an ad' or on the hanger and others who don't like the hassle of changing rooms.

As with all my 'advice', the final thing is... If you really (really) love it and feel wow in it, forget all of the above and go for it!

What are your top tips?

Happy shopping!
Denise x

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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My first 'Hello Fashion Monthly' magazine

Thoughts in 5-4-3-2-1

Yesterday I saw the new Hello Fashion Magazine on sale for a pound, and was straight in there! It's been around for a year now but it's the first time I've brought it as I'm usually reading work material on train rides or soaking up fashion news via blogs and social media.

• What I liked about it (5)

It's glossy, focuses on what it says on the tin (fashion), gets a good balance between content and pictures, has items across the price range, and has a familiar format with the inclusion of beauty and lifestylewhich was comforting.

• What I loved about it (4)

A section for bridal (not sure if it's permanent the but I hope it's at least a feature periodically), so much colour, reading about designers rather than a sole focus on their output, the presentation of 1 buy 4 ways

• What I want from it! (3)

My top picks: A buy now, a buy maybe and a buy...if I win the lottery!

 

• Who/what I discovered in it (2)

Susie Bubble and her brightness; her blog is now in my favourites. And, I'd not heard of 'Three floor' before but having checked out their website I think I'm in lust! (three floor.com)*

• What I wasn't so hot on? (1)

Sorry, but it just didn't 'look' diverse - I see the same type of  models and advertising yet again. Why? There are dark skinned models, plus-size, petite and models with disabilities (though anyone featured may of course have a hidden disability) who could give a mag' an edge imho.

Would I get it again? That'd be a yes!

If it's a glossy you've read what are your thoughts and how does it compare to your other faves?

Denise x

 

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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* my blog is in no way sponsored, so any brand references are personal and independent.

#Fashfest - More than fashion...

...at "Meet the Stylists"

• The expectation:

Last night I attended Cosmopolitan's "Meet the Stylists" event. According to the write up in the mag we were to expect a 'chance to learn the trade secrets of celebrity style from our panel of fashion and beauty experts'

On that panel were Justine Jenkins, Michelle Humphrey, Lilah Parsons and Gemma Sheppard. Experts indeed. And they were interviewed by Farrah Storr, the editor of Cosmo herself.

• My reality:

However, I didn't come away with trade secrets. I came away with much more!

I had expected to be told about the latest trends, but instead we were treated to stories about the personal journeys of everyone on stage in an open and engaging manner.

If I'm honest I had expected them to a fair bit of ego and some posturing (sorry ladies), but instead we saw 'real' women who were humble, passionate and hardworking.

I had expected it all to be a little TV with the audience kept at a distance from these celebs of style, but each one of them answered questions graciously and waited at the end to speak to their eager audience.

I didn't come away with tricks of the trade - I came away believing that what they had was possible with a willingness to 'learn the trade' (Lilah), use social media and contacts (Michelle), do a little for free and then know/charge your worth (Justine) and to take your chances and be confident (Gemma); and lots more tips!

Unlike some of the (generally younger) audience I wasn't looking for the tricks of the trade or an in, I was looking for some tips. And I got them, but not tips on fashion, nails and beauty...
... I came away inspired, with tips (reminders) on how to get on in life.

• So, what am I going to do with all that?

I'm starting here, and will boldly share this blog with them!

I'm going to take a makeup class.

And, I can't wait to put this to the young people I speak to in schools who might well be told that fashion is shallow and not a real career.

Thank you ladies!*

More life than fashion, no spring chicken and proud!
Denise x

*Sorry, the photos aren't that sassy and there's no Instagram!

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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Beautiful...

...A musical with a message.

I recently saw the musical "Beautiful" based on the story of Carol King, and I loved it! But despite a fab performance by award winning Katie Brayben, and cast, that's not why I'm writing this blog.

I'm writing it because I felt there was a body confidence message in it.
(I know, never quite 'off-duty'!)...

In an early scene 'Carol' talks about not being good enough in the looks department to get noticed by 'Gerry'. Later there's a brief exchange between 'Carol' and 'Cynthia' when 'Janelle's' looks are mentioned. And then there's the suggestion by 'Carol' herself she doesn't think she fits the image of a female lead vocalists when it's suggested she performs her own songs.

The super talented singer, songwriter, legend Carol King herself has endorsed the show and so I take it that such image issues/perceptions of beauty are ones she at least recognises.

Don't let the celeb status fool you - hang-ups about the way we look affects many of us irrespective of our talents, looks or role at least some of the time. 

We all know that in the end Carol's talent is what shines through, but the point is how often we let how we feel about ourselves in the looks department hold us back. As the show portrays, we have to decide to push past our insecurities, grab some body confidence (or at least embrace what makes us special), and hang onto it if we want people hear our true voice and see the "Natural woman" (sorry gents, had to get this reference in!)

How often do YOU let the way you look (or your perception about the way you look) affect what you go for in a relationship or your career, for example?

DON'T!

But, as it's easier said than done, if you're struggling I'm sure "You've got a friend" who can help you with that. We're usually way more harsh on ourselves than others, so enlist some support*

And (not really a spoiler!), let me tell you how the show closes: Yes, it closes with the number "Beautiful" which 'reflects themes present throughout the "Tapestry" album, such as the importance of self-esteem and positive outlook' - https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beautiful_(Carole_King_song)



http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/caroleking/beautiful.html



 

 Go on, listen to Carol!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GE0TatKLHxo
Denise x

 

PS - *Professional help is available eg from organisations such as The Body Dysmorphic Disorder Foundation (bddfoundation.org) - don't hesitate to contact me if you need redirecting.

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
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Back to black... Clothes, that is!

I lasted more than a month!

In my last blog (http://damsonbelle.blogspot.co.uk/2015/06/a-ban-on-black-clothes-that-is.html) I talked about the challenge I'd set myself to #wearnoblack. And I did it. Even at a professionals 'black tie' event. For over a month. Both at play and (often more of a challenges) at work.

This week, I went back to wearing black - deliberately and consciously. And it had to be, because I realised that I'd created a new habit*. The habit of NOT wearing back.

It felt odd. I wore black trousers, a white top, royal blue shoes and a black, white, blue patterned jacket. An outfit that I'd often worn on auto-pilot before. It fit the workwear formula: wear a black dress, skirt or trousers and work around that.

The jacket - worn with a white top and black trews!

So I went to work and for the first time in a month not one person mentioned my outfit. Not one! I didn't miss the comments through vanity but honestly... Work genuinely seemed quieter, and the weather was a bit miserable! I'd spent the whole month wearing colour, enjoyed the challenge, and felt bright. The bonus was that it triggered so many conversations starting with comments like:

• You really know how to put colours together
• You always look (insert something flattering!) in colour
• Your colour combinations always cheer me up
• What colours should I wear to make me look so vibrant?

All the comments/questions reinforced that colour can really create a positive mood, and done in an appropriate way (eg for your personal colouring and environment), colour can be the starter of a great conversation - because we don't always see too much colour in corporate environments.

The following day to complete the experiment, I wore two bright but complimentary colours and no black again. My boss queried what was up that I'd worn black the day before, a colleague said she'd didn't think I'd smiled as much as 'normal' and our College librarian said - you looked like a CEO-in-waiting yesterday (and whilst diplomatic she didn't seem to mean it in a good way, no offence to CEO's!)

Now, I get that for some people that's what they're going for. The blend-in look or the I'm corporate look. And that's fine. But, consider this...

In colour I still looked professional. (There was still a formula eg jacket, heels, appropriate length attire). And, here's the real thing - I also brought a little life to my look and managed to cheer people up at a time when happiness/wellbeing at work is high on the agenda.

Madeleine Albright rose in colour!
http://muzy.com/l/0ikbmxu9

Going forward, I will wear black. And colour. But I will be really conscious of when. And mindful of why.

So, I ask you again - how long could you go without wearing black?
And I challenge you - If black is an auto-pilot staple for you, try going without wearing it for a while and let me know how you get on!

Have a bright weekend!
Denise x

PS - *They say it takes 21 days to form a new habit.

Need some advice?

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
• Look at: www.damsonbelle.co.uk
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