Hair today, Gone tomorrow?

No hair? No fear?

I've seen several posts, and had some conversations, about the first thing people will do after lockdown ends (again, this time, for a time?). For me, second only to seeing my family and friends is a trip to the hairdressers.

It may seem vain but my hair is not just about a look for me - it's a real marker of health and wellbeing. 

Some years ago after a particularly stressful time, my hair started falling out in clumps. And all these years later, I still have a notable, impacting bald patch. Stress is still a factor. I suspect a likely lack of vitamin D will play its part and for others, there will be other reasons too. It is an annoyance and a frustration because I can't just do what I want with my hair. It's bigger than my personal perspective too because society prizes hair... and lots of it. Again, it's often that hair is linked to health as well as to society's narrative of beauty. Don't believe me... just look at TV ads and magazines! 

H for Hidden in the Body Confidence Card deck was inspired by this thinking. Hairloss is something we try to hide, are encouraged to. Something I've tried to deny and ignore.

I'm fortunate that I've had some great stylists over the years, and these days wigs and weaves are not exactly news, so it's by no means all doom and drama for me. I'm grateful for the headwear I've had during the lockdown. And I'm bolder and more open about my bald patch now anyway. However, that trip to the hairdressers will be my moment of truth... will I have lost more hair through anxiety or will less toxicity (due to less travel) and more home cooking turn the tide? Who knows!

What I do know is that after this lockdown, much like the previous ones, many of us will be seeking a treat(ment) that will appear to be pure pampering but will be so much more. 

What, if anything, is it going to be for you? - A manicure, facial, massage, body scrub, replacing skincare, or treating yourself to a new lippy? Whatever your answer, why and what can you do now while you wait are really the questions! 

If there's an underlying reason for your treats, don't lose sight of what it is and do what you can not to let it slide too far. It's important we note our health markers and do what we can to maintain our bodies and minds. Eat happy. Keep moving. Sleep well. Home spa. Think positive!

However, just a little reminder - if what you're thinking of doing is to suit a narrow societal narrative, think twice. We're still in a pandemic, health is wealth and other people's opinions about your body are just that - their opinions.

See you on the other side, where it'll be nice to have less health-fear even if it is with less hair in my case!

Stay well,

Denise 💞💞💞

W: www.bodyconfidencecards.com

I: bodyconfidencecards_db

T: @_BodyConfidence

F: Body Confidence Card Club 

Hair, part one!

Hair there? A poem - of sorts!  

Last month was #NationalAlopeciaMonth but I wasn't ready. Today, is #National PoetryDay. It's given me a nudge to share this - it's part of a bigger story and has been sitting on my phone for a bit.

Here goes...

Could it be?
There's something coming through
Where smooth and empty once was.
No, don't begin to believe Denise.
We've been here before.
Hope.
Belief.
The not really promises.
But the maybes 'this product will work'
There'll be some growth
There is some growth
But, sigh. Oh no,
Then and again, it was a brief, false hope
No real change, not for long anyway
Back undercover - a new wig or piece
And then, a new place
Heard a new maybe 
Not really a promise but a confident "you'll see"
That where there once was liitle or no growth
There might possibly be some
Where there was nothing
There might now be something
Progress, could it be?
Shoots, like stubble
Not getting too excited, but a quiet yippee
Some hair, my hair
Covering where the bald patch used to be.
It seems true, it seems real,
Maybe. This time. Just maybe.
Maybe it will grow
Really grow
Into a crown
Recreate the beauty that society sees
Hair
We're beautiful with or without it right?
But how most of us long to be, 
with A full head of hair
Flowing or big
Eyelashes, eyebrows, hair - our own
Not that it should matter, but it does
Either way, we're beautiful
Aren't we?
It shouldn't define me.
Whatever happens, hair today or none tomorrow
I won't let it define me, I'll be. I am.
Fine.

Hair all lost, hidden, all yours, I see you!
Denise 💞💞💞

www.bodyconfidencecards.com

My summer holiday style by number!

My summer holiday 1-2-6!

Holiday dressing and shopping is something I find a pleasure. I love the hotter weather, but dressing for the office in hot weather is sometimes a challenge so let's face it, in the UK I don't get to wear my shorts and sunnies that often (as weekend sunshine isn't guaranteed)!

This year was no exception, I loved planning my summer wardrobe and packing before my holiday, and shopping in Spain. So...
...Here's my 1-2-6 of this summers holiday style:

1. My make up bag travelled with me, but I really only used one item - my new "Oh my gloss" Rimmel lipgloss. It's rather lush - bright but subtle, not too sticky and stays put!

2. I seemed to do my accessories in two's* - I travelled with two hats (though only one mate it back sadly), two pairs of sunglasses, and brought two bracelets to match two rings, and two rings (not to match the bracelets!)
*I didn't stick to the two accessory rule when it came to shoes mind you!

3. I brought three new dresses: I hadn't intended to! I do always like to buy one dress on holiday as it's nice to have something that nobody else is likely to turn up wearing at a summer wedding! However, this time around I couldn't resist three beauties - one sassy, one sweet and one oh so-easy-to-wear. You can decide which the one below is...

One new dress, in white. With white sandals. Hair up, fringe back.

4. I seemed to wear four colours predominantly: red, pink, white and black. Picking colours in my palette that I could mix and match made dressing easy especially as my printed items could all be co-ordinated with one of these. It really helps with packing to focus on a few colours.

5. Shoes* are my packing nemesis - I need flip flops and trainers for practical reasons, but being petite and needing a variety of heel heights to make certain outfits work makes taking any less a challenge... for me.

On trend tropical print. Worn with hot pink. One pair of heels, out of 5 pairs of shoes.

6. My hair - I wore a curly ponytail which meant I could wear a full ponytail, a shortened ponytail and a full updo... add to that my fringe au natural, straightened or plaited and those six variations meant a whole range of 'hair-do's'

What's been your 2016 summer style by numbers, so far - make up, accessories, clothes, purchases? Let's hope we don't have to pack it all away too soon, so...

...Here's to a warm September!
Denise x

PS - More pics may follow.

Before the Front Row!

http://www.modelsofdiversity.org/thefrontrow/

Would you share your story?

I was approached to take part in the Models of Diversity Front Row event following my #30daysofbodypraise blog at http://damsonbelle.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/%2330daysofbodypraise which set out to promote the Body Confidence calendar (http://2015calendar.co.uk/) project.

With the event taking place in the next few weeks the excitement and nerves are beginning to kick in, so this blog is about where I'm coming from and where I'm at!

I'm nervous because Body Confidence isn't an easy subject and we can't be sure we'll connect with every member of the audience. However it's a great opportunity to explore the issue, connect with others for whom it's important and because if we can make a difference to how just one person perceives themselves it'll be worth it.

I'm very passionate about the issue, and the impression I have (based on loads of discussion with clients, having worked with models, and in writing the blog) is that most people, if not everyone, struggles with body confidence at least sometimes.

I also believe everyone has a body confidence timeline - times when we've been confident, maybe because we've been given positive messages; and times when that's not been the case.

Timing is also key and it is often the messages we've heard in our teen years that have the most impact as it is then that we're most likely to be trying to get the balance between rebellion and conformity right. However, if you're a parent don't think that the early years messages have no impact at all - they do.

For example, I'm currently experiencing hair loss and having heard "a woman's hair is her beauty" since childhood, this experience is a particular challenge and is becoming another part of my story. However it's not what's happening that defines my body confidence - the difference comes from 'parking' that old and unhelpful belief, being honest about the issue, seeking help and ultimately recognising (saying and believing) that my hair doesn't define me! It's a process and not always an easy one, but we can overcome our body confidence issues and talking about them is a good place to start.

And that's the spirit I hope I'm able to get across on Monday night.

If we can track and understand our journey we're on the right path, and it's a path personal to each one of us. And PS: as the media doesn't know us all, we shouldn't let us influence us too much.

When it comes to influence, I'm going with listening to the others on the panel. See why here: http://www.modelsofdiversity.org/thefrontrow/

I hope you'll join us to ask your questions, share your stories and views and hear more from this passionate and experienced group of 'experts'

To book your ticket, go to: http://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/front-row-tickets-11988460809

http://damsonbelle.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/%2330daysofbodypraise

Hope to see you at the event.....

Denise x

For more:

• Call on: 07887 643807 for a body confidence coaching session or image services
• Look at: www.damsonbelle.co.uk
• Follow at: @DenDamBelle
• Check out my Pintrest: Denise Sanderson-Estcourt
• Like me at: Damson Belle on Facebook
• Join: This blog!

Treat your Hair like its your Heart

Hair - our crowning glory...

...That’s what they call it, and quite literally I believe it to be true.  

Audrey of Esteem Wigs

The hair on our head becomes an integral part of our being - but you will never know how true this is until you no longer have it. It needs tending to and maintaining - how hair looks, how it makes us feel has an intravenous line directly hooked into who we are and how we feel about ourselves.

Styling, making it ready is a daily chore for some - right next to the ironing and putting the washing out, but we take a lot of time, pleasure and pride in showing it off to its best. For other’s it’s a natural asset, all beauty and no effort and for some it’s a short back and sides to keep it just how they want to it with minimum effort.

Young or old, male or female it seems mostly that we have love and hate relationship with our hair, but boy is it wonderful when you get it right. It’s beautiful to look at if cared for, it’s sensual and comforting to touch, it frames our faces and finishes the human body perfectly, and more practically, it keeps us warm. So given this, it does surprise me that we tend not to treat it like the “golden fleece”, providing only natures goodness from the inside out.  I mean it’s not like ears, attached by skin, the hair growth and attachment is through a small cell on the underneath of you scalp, and once damaged can cause weakness.

If you speak to any trichologist they can show you how poor diet, and health and chemicals can have a detrimental affect on your hair overtime. 

So like most things in life, everything should be balanced and in moderation, moderation, and moderation. Don’t junk it with gunk, eat well, exercise and don’t wash, iron, curl, treat it too often.

I know this more than most, as I was 18 years old when I lost all the hair on my scalp and body due to Alopecia Universalis a condition, which causes complete hair loss including brows and lashes. So with me, hair loss was a disease opposed to any type of mistreatment, although, I did let a friend perm some of it once making me look like a poodle, but the end results of any form of loss tends to be the same.

So don’t all run out and ditch your lovely and expensive hair lotions and potions, instead take it as some positive advice and messaging about keeping your hair and scalp strong because the effects of hair loss are fairly devastating emotionally and physically and it can take a long time to come to terms with it.

Our stores are bulging to the brim with hair products and we are mesmerised by the way we look – coiffed or au naturel – all I ask is that you treat your hair like your heart, keep it in tip top condition, get it checked now and then and look after it with care. Great hair is our crowning glory there is no denying it.

Guest blog, courtesy of Audrey Ball, Esteem Hair Loss Consultancy (June 2014) www.esteemwigs.co.uk 020 3397 6634

Thanks to Audrey for today's blog, tomorrow...

I'll be back!

Denise x

PS: Find out more about the project that's behind #30daysofbodypraise at: http://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/BodyConfidence and please support us however you can.